Clearing the Path On Death, Loss, and Grief

Clearing the Path is a collection of clinical stories that illustrate practical, applicable communication tools for professionals in work with end-of-life patients and families. These vignettes from practice demonstrate how impending death, death itself, and the loss of a relationship affect
the lives and grief of both patients and survivors.

Written 13 years after its companion volume The Weeping Willow, the book brings even more complex encounters and nuanced emotions from additional years of experience in the field. The stories are woven in with the counseling process, thought process, and dilemmas of the counselor. Each story is then
followed by "Notes to the Practitioner" with clear, practical and professional advice on navigating various communication issues and end with "Conclusions" which are short summaries of each vignette's teachings. At the end of each chapter the reader will find recent, annotated references for those
who wish to read more about the topic. Chapters provide new, in-depth tools for dealing with death, grief, and loss from both the griever and the counselor or medical professional's perspective. What is unique to this book is the insight into the authentic human emotions experienced by both
counselors and clients in these encounters with dying and grieving, making it useful for both the caregivers and the recipients of end-of-life care.

Acknowledging that communication is individual and dependent on all the involved parties, these stories were selected to demonstrate many ways of communication through a range of situations, as well as the various attitudes, harmful and helpful, revealed in responses from people surrounding the
patient or griever. Clearing the Path is not a conventional "how- to" book and it aims instead to teach by example from the hands-on counseling experiences of two experts who have worked in the field of field of death and dying, grieving and loss with responsibility and care. For professionals at
all levels of experience those looking to navigate the difficulties of end-of-life care, this is the perfect guide.

Lynne Halamish is a Thanatologist (M.A., C.T.), an expert in death and dying, loss and grieving. She is a counsellor for grieving and dying people, and a teacher, lecturing and providing workshops, locally and internationally, to professionals in the health field, psychosocial field, educational
field, and to groups of grievers. In hospitals, medical and nursing schools, professional conferences, high schools, army bases, and community settings. She also provides supervision to experts in the field. Member of the Kappy and Eric Flanders National Palliative Care Resource Centre of Ben Gurion
University of the Negev, Israel.

Preface
Acknowledgments
Grief Map

Part I. Preparing for Death
Chapter 1: Living Eulogy: Giving the Patient Maximum Control
Chapter 2: No- Man's Land: Last- Wishes Dilemma
Chapter 3: Ready When You Are: Preparing for Death
Chapter 4: The Phoenix: Dealing with Recurring Illness and Remissions
Chapter 5: It Takes a Village: Where Culture Defines Us
Chapter 6: Legacy: Choosing What to Leave Behind
Chapter 7: Last Respects: Communication with Patient and Family

Part II. Preparing Children for a Death
Chapter 8: Plan B: Using Teachable Moments with Children
Chapter 9: Denial: Blessing the Children Before You Go
Chapter 10: Carpet Talk: Talking to Small Children about a Dying Classmate
Chapter 11: Last Lullaby: Saying Goodbye to Young Children

Part III. Unexpected Death and Associated Concerns
Chapter 12: Haunted: Finding Meaning in a Meaningless Death

Part IV. Funeral- Related Concerns
Chapter 13: The Big Event: Children and Family Funerals
Chapter 14: It's My Party: Allowing Someone to Speak

Part V. After Death: Bereavement- Related Concerns
Chapter 15: Clearing the Path: Holding on by Letting Go
Chapter 16: Refresh: Neutralizing Destructive Memorials
Chapter 17: Hand- Me- Down Death: Blessing and Cursing
Chapter 18: The Taj Mahal: Choosing to Leave Your Ghosts Behind
Chapter 19: Renovation: Reframing the Narrative

Part VI. Communication- Related Concerns
Chapter 20: Quicksand: The Trap in Your Past
Chapter 21: The Petrified Woman: Making Assumptions
Chapter 22: The Silent Woman: Messages That Go Unheard

Part VII. Other Topics and Concerns
Chapter 23: The Cornerman: Defining Your Work
Chapter 24: The Ripple Effect: Who Will Leave Next?
Chapter 25: Senicide: Suicide Contagion
Chapter 26: The Threat: How Do You Know It's Real?
Chapter 27: Dancing on Blood: The Side Effects of Transplants
Chapter 28: Basil: Recovering or Reinventing the Self
Chapter 29: The Stuff of Dreams: Finding the Meaning
Chapter 30: Surviving Death: The End of Grief

Appendix A: The Toolbox
Appendix B: Looking for the End of Grief
Afterword
Index